i despised my Mum these days.
i thank my Sister for being there for me.
finally, my Sister can see with her own eyes how my Mum treat me.
she always hear me talk about it.
and when she see it herself, she too agreed my Mum GILA!
ive done nothing wrong.
but she's scolding me as though im a maid.
she scolds me over small things or things i didnt do.
i want so bad to fight back.
but i dont want to be rude.
cause if i do, i bet my whole family will turn their backs on me.
i dont want history to repeat itself.
i dont want my family to think, as i grow older i get more bolder and more rude.
so i listened to my Sister and ignored.
kept quiet.
controlling my temper.
Mum is such a two-face.
i dont understand.
ive just got blame for something i didnt do. it was of the limit, i really felt like screaming at her.
whatever i do is wrong, so why asked me to do it in the first place.
i should have gone out just now. but ♥ is with his family.
so i shall not disturb him.
i dont want to be home tomorrow.
i'll go for my session and straight meet ♥.
i dont want to see Mum's face.
it's very hurting.

anyhoos.
we went to the cemetery today.
if only Papa was still alive, Mummy wont treat me this way.
Papa pampers me.
haish, i miss Papa.
despite only able to spent 5years with him.
and he passed away when i was 6years old. and on that year 1998, he was so sick i didnt manage to spend time with him except keeping him company in the hospital.
and witnessed his BYEBYE on 18th Feb, in my house.
hais.
heartbreaking.
i can still remember the incident.
cause i was the first to see it.
imagine, how innocent i was. yet Papa just had to leave.
he's a nice person. very nice.
i pray for his well-being with ALLAH above.
may his soul be with the nice ones.
everytime, Mum mistreat me. all i can think about is Papa. hais.
though, i dont remember anything he's done for me.
but i know he will always exist in my heart.
i miss Papa.

cut the emo crap.
Mum didnt cook today.
and here i am starving.
bullshit!
ok whatever.
i think i shall end.
long enough huh? ok bye!